Stuff your face with these new state fair foods

Shakopee Valley News

The only reason to make the journey to the Minnesota State Fair, wait in an endless line for the parking garages, pay for parking, wait in an endless line to enter the fairground and deal with the massive amount of people is the food.

Sure, there are rides and games and music and exhibits... but the food. The first thing anyone mentions when you say you are going to the fair is, “are you going to get Sweet Martha’s cookies?”

Of course you are, you’re not a heathen.

But Sweet Martha’s Cookie Jar is just one piece of the proverbial (and in some cases, literal) pie that is food at the state fair. For those with temerarious tastebuds, the Minnesota State Fair is a dynamic, developing culinary world with tantalizing treats added each year.

Below is a list of the new state fair foods added for the upcoming season, designed to make your palate sigh in delight and your belt groan from stress.

Ahi Tuna Poke Bowl

A poke bowl is a sort of Hawaiian salad — but better, because it’s made with delicious ingredients rather than sad leaves. This poke bowl is served cold with ahi tuna, avocado, mango and pico de gallo in a ginger-soy sauce served over rice with a fried wonton.

Where is it: Café Caribe, between Chamber Street and Nelson Street.

Bananas Foster French Toast

As it turns out, french toast can get better. This french toast is cinnamon swirled, topped with fresh bananas and an orange-rum flavored caramel sauce. The entire concoction is topped with a dollop of whipped cream, much like a woman is not a queen until her coronation.

Where is it: Hamline Church Dining Hall, between Underwood Street and Cooper Street.

BBQ Split

Some people dare to dream — often, they shoot for the moon and end up burning up in the sun. And then there are those who dream and go farther than anyone has ever gone before, but stop in the nick of time. That’s the case for the BBQ Split, which features scoops of BBQ pulled pork, scoops of mac and cheese and scoops of coleslaw served with a pickle spear. Snap it up quick, because this bad boy is only available between Aug. 29 and Sept. 3.

Where is it: Midtown Global Market’s Mama D’s, at the International Bazaar.

Blueberry Rhubarb Cobbler

Maybe you don’t want to go crazy with a BBQ Split. Maybe you want something classic and comforting. The Blueberry Rhubarb Cobbler is there for you, with organic blueberries and rhubarb blended together and topped with a cornmeal biscuit and a dollop of whipped cream. It tastes like the country home you never lived in.

Where is it: Farmers Union Coffee Shop, between Cooper Street and Cosgrove Street.

Earth Wings

After you’ve gotten your fair share of meat sweats, you’ll need something to feel better about yourself. That way when you go home, you can say, “I mostly ate bad but I got my share of vegetables.” Enter Earth Wings. They are cauliflower pieces dipped in a seasoned batter, deep-fried and slathered with organic sesame BBQ sauce. It’s vegan and gluten-free, so feel free to eat every other caloric mess without guilt.

Where is it: French Meadow Bakery & Cafe, between Nelson Street and Underwood Street.

Firecracker Shrimp Stuffed Avocado

Anything that involves the phrase “stuffed in avocado halves” is bound to be good. When that avocado is stuffed with gulf white shrimp, it’s even better. When those white shrimp are tossed with lime, onion, black beans, tomato and fire-roasted corn in a garlic aioli and drizzled with cilantro-infused olive oil and served with flatbread, it can’t get any better. That’s the Firecracker Shrimp Stuffed Avocado.

Where is it: The Hideaway Speakeasy, in the Veranda, Grandstand upper level.

General Tso Chicken Taco

Combining Chinese and Mexican food is a dangerous game. Perhaps the most dangerous game, like hunting humans on a private island. With the General Tso Chicken Taco, it’s a marriage of the best of both worlds with deep-friend chicken smothered in a ginger, garlic, soy sauce and Asian spices sauce with seasoned cream cheese topped with wonton crisps and green onion, all served on a flour tortilla. It’s a holy matrimony that is only available from Aug. 23-28.

Where is it: Midtown Global Market’s Taco Cat, in the International Bazaar.

Honey Cream Soda Float

This is not a food. But a mixture of food and beverage is always worth a stop. In this case it’s honey cream soda, which is made without sugar, poured over Minnesota Grown honey ice cream. Save the bees and order this float.

Where is it: Minnesota Honey Producers Association, in the Agriculture Horticulture Building.

Irish Tater Kegs

If you hear the words “Irish Tater Kegs” altogether, you better be paying attention. Not big and not giant, but jumbo deep-friend tater tots made with corned beef, sauerkraut, Swiss cheese, sour cream and potatoes drizzled with Thousand Island dressed and nestled, like little baby birds, on a nest of sauerkraut.

Where is it: O’Gara’s at the Fair, on Dan Patch Avenue and Cosgrove Street.

Mangonada Shave Ice

It gets hot in the summer of Minnesota. Reminisce to those blizzard days with the Mangonada Shave Ice — mango-flavored shave ice topped with Mexican chamoy sauce, brushed with tajin chili powder, crowned with bursting mango boba balls and served with a tamarind candy straw.

Where is it: Minnesnowii Shave Ice, in the West End Market.

Messy Giuseppe

Italian food is never the wrong choice. You could be in the middle of the Saraha Desert, no water for miles around and a big bowl of spaghetti carbonara would never be the wrong choice. The same is true for the Minnesota State Fair. Meaning the Messy Giuseppe, which is seasoned ground beef and Italian pork sausage drowned in marinara, topped with parmesan cheese and served on Italian bread would never be the wrong choice.

Where is it: Mancini’s al Fresco, between Nelson Street and Underwood Street.

Moroccan Sausage Bowl

You might be in Minnesota, but feel like you’re on vacation in Morocco with the Moroccan Sausage Bowl. The bowl features ground beef and lamb sausage seasoned with herbs, sweet spices and red pepper cooked with carrots, turnips and chick peas and topped with onions and a singular green olive. They know exactly how much olive you need and it’s one.

Where is it: Sausage by Cynthia, between Nelson Street and Underwood Street.

Nordic Waffles

These waffles have not one, not two, not three, not four, not five, not six, but seven varieties, all to tickle your tastebuds. These varieties include All-Day Breakfast, Berries and Cream, Cinna-Sugar Butter, Slammin’ Salmon On-A-Stick, S’More, Turkey Chipotle Club and Vegetarian Viking. You could eat waffles for every meal, which we, as humanity, should already be doing.

Where is it: Nordic Waffles, in the West End Market.

Pepperoni Chips

Just because you could make this one at home doesn’t mean it’s not worth the money. You’ve never taken the time to roast pepperoni and serve it with a roasted red pepper queso. These people did, and they’re serving them as chips.

Where is it: LuLu’s Public House, in the West End Market.

Rainbow Cloud Roll

If you’ve ever eaten a bowl of fruity cereal and thought, “this isn’t sugary enough,” the Rainbow Cloud Roll is for you. This saccharine sweet features three hand-rolled scoops of ice cream (with choices of Superman, vanilla, strawberry and chocolate) sprinkled with fruity cereal and wrapped in a pillow of cotton candy, much like a baby wrapped in a blanket who is unable to move their extremities.

Where is it: Rainbow Ice Cream, in the upper level of the Grandstand.

Shrimp Ceviche

Maybe you’re looking for a timeless food that is sure to be a hit no matter where it’s from. That’s the Shrimp Ceviche, made with fresh shrimp, cucumbers, japaleños, onions, tomatoes and cilantro, tossed with citrus lime juice and served with tortilla chips. This dish is best served like revenge — cold.

Where is it: Shrimp Shack, on Carnes Avenue and Underwood Street.

Slider Flights

The only thing better than one sandwich is three sandwiches. The only thing better than three sandwiches is seven sandwiches, but we won’t get into that right now because the Slider Flights serve three sandwiches with a variety of toppings. The Brisket Flight has one topped with coleslaw, one with pickles and onions and one with fried onions. The Burger Flight has one topped with candied bacon and cheddar cheese, one with smoked gouda and one with BBQ sauce, pepper jack cheese and crispy fried onions. The Pulled Pork Flight has one topped with coleslaw, one with pickled and onions and one with fried onions.

Where is it: The Hangar, on Murphy Avenue and Underwood Street.

Smoked Soft Serve Ice Cream

There is such a thing as cold smoke, which means the process that gives your ribs that irresistible flavor can be applied to ice cream. Is it an act of God? Maybe. Certainly, Smoked Soft Serve Ice Cream will be available in Cold Brew Coffee and Muscovado Sugar Vanilla flavors.

Where is it: Blue Moon Dine-In Theater at Carnes Avenue and Chambers Street.

Swedish Meatball Smörgås

For Scandinavians wanting to get back to their Nordic roots, the Swedish Meatball Smörgås features a pork and beef meatball sandwich with white gravy, lingonberry sauce and dill pickles.

Where is it: The Blue Barn, at the West End Market.

Sweet Greek Cheese Puffs

Forget the Scandinavians and journey to southern Europe with the Sweet Greek Cheese Puffs, featuring flaky phyllo dough filled with feta and ricotta cheese, deep-fried and topped with honey and powdered sugar. It’s cheese, honey, sugar and dough. There are no misses there.

Where is it: Dino’s Gyros, between Nelson Street and Underwood Street.

Sweetie Cakes

Cake is a classic treat and there’s nothing wrong in going for a tried-and-true treat. These include black forest, birthday, chocolate peanut butter cakes baked in a cup and packed with toffee bits as well as whipped cream.

Where is it: Sweetie Cakes, in the Food Building.

Triple Chocolate Strawberry Shortcake

Combining triple chocolate and strawberry shortcake is a genius madman move. In this case, the madman (or madwoman) paired dense chocolate cake with chocolate chips and fudge icing with strawberries and whipped cream.

Where is it: The Strawberry Patch, between Carnes Avenue and Judson Avenues.

Turducken Sausage Sandwich

It doesn’t have to be a strange holiday dish that your weird aunt brings out every Thanksgiving and Christmas — the turducken is for everyday life. What would be an abominable creature makes a delicious meal with turkey, duck and chicken served on a fennel bun, accompanied by Giggle’s sweet and saucy relish. Feel free to have a few because this dish is gluten-free.

Where is it: Giggles’ Campfire Grill, at The North Woods.

UpNorth Puff Pasty

Like the United States of America itself, we’ve taken something British and made it our own with the UpNorth Puff Pasty. This proper meal pairs porketta susage, cheese curds, mustard and a dill pickle with a puffy crust sprinkled with pepper and sea salt. The Bald Eagle sitting on your shoulder while you eat it is optional.

Where is it: Sausage Sister & Me, in the Food Building.

Wood-Grilled Elote

Grilled is good. Wood-grilled is better. Wood-Grilled Elote is corn-on-the-cob grilled over an oak wood fire (none of those beech wood fires here), brushed with chile-spiced mayo and sprinkled with queso Cotija and lime juice.

Where is it: Tejas Express, in The Garden.

Za-Waffle Sticks

Want to make a waffle zany? Just add the “za.” These waffles are blended with pepperoni and mozzarella and topped with a parmesan herb blend, served with pepperoni-infused maple syrup or marinara sauce. But don’t order this and then chicken out with the classic marinara sauce. Go big: Go for the pepperoni-infused maple syrup.

Where is it: Green Mill, at the Family Fair at Baldwin Park.

Zesty PB&J Sausage

We’ve had peanut butter with burgers. We’ve had peanut butter with pickles. Now, we have peanut butter with sausages. The Zesty PB&J Sausage features peanut butter, cherry jelly, cayenne pepper and cilantro blended into a quarter-pound sausage. Peanut butter is the most versatile food.

Where is it: Gass Station Grill, between Dan Patch Avenue and Judson Avenue.

So go ahead. Unbutton your pants or let your belt out an extra notch and get to tasting at the Minnesota State Fair in St. Paul this summer.