'Bachelorette' recap: Making sense of drama, ambulance calls

Prior Lake American

It was a rough week for the men left vying for the heart of 2008 Prior Lake High School graduate Becca Kufrin on “The Bachelorette.”

Normally, approximately one ambulance is called per season and production plays it up during the previews until the end of time. Not only was one ambulance called during the most recent episode of “The Bachelorette,” two were called.

But we’ll get to that.

For those uninitiated to Bachelor Nation, the lead of the show goes on dates (with the option of group, one-on-one or two-on-one dates) and then hosts a rose ceremony to send contestants home if the lead is not interested in pursuing those relationships further. Those with roses get to stay and go on more dates. This continues until the end of the season where there are just two contestants left and the lead gets engaged to one of them.

The episode began by continuing the drama revealed last week that contestant Colton had dated former “Bachelor” contestant Tia before coming on the show.

“It’ll move us to a different level once we get past it,” Colton said.

Of course, production knew this information all along and so made sure that the group date this episode would include the men giving a spa day to Kufrin and “Bachelor” friends Bekah, Kendall, Seinne, Caroline and... Tia — as well as making sure that Colton was on that date.

In addition to Wills, Jason, Jordan, David and Jean Blanc, but they aren’t as important. Kufrin even forgot the name of Jason, which at this point, no one can blame her.

“I know Jason’s name,” Kufrin said, convincing no one. “Jason, Jason, Jason.”

Colton and Tia decide to move past the awkwardness by not acknowledging or looking at each other in any way whatsoever in a small room where they both are.

Nailed it.

To be fair to Colton, Kufrin and Tia were dating the same man during the entire last season of “The Bachelor.” Of course, they were probably hoping to not repeat that.

Tia assures Kufrin that her and Colton had kissed but had never had the “what are we” conversation.

“He told me within a few days of talking, he told me about applying for the show,” Tia said. “I was like, ‘what are the odds of you actually making it?’”

Though Kufrin said she was still confused at the end of her conversation with Tia, she declares that her and Colton have moved past it and gives him the group date rose during the cocktail party in the evening.

“Overcoming that obstacle at this stage — so early on — is so telling to future obstacles,” Kufrin said. “I saw how patient he was and how respectable he was and I feel like I can finally give him the chance to get to know him.”

Back at the cocktail party, male-model Jordan is bragging about his 4,000 Tinder matches. For those who were able to meet people off the internet, Tinder is a dating app where you can swipe right if you like someone and left if you don’t, all based off a few pictures and a small bio. If that person also swipes right, it’s considered a “match.”

You can also run out of people to swipe if you do it too much, so 4,000 seems like a high number.

David then uses his one-on-one time to talk about Jordan and his number of matches. “I’m not one to throw someone under the bus,” David tells Kufrin, before throwing Jordan under the bus.

It’s only the third episode and Kufrin has had to deal with texting exes drama, picture frame drama, Colton and Tia drama and now this. Understandably, she looks like she’s over having to trivial issues.

“Hey Jordan — 4,000 matches? High five bud, that’s a good streak,” Kufrin said.

That is a power move. He can’t not high five her because it would be awkward to leave her hanging but at the same time, a high five means he’s proud of the number of women he has on Tinder while dating Kufrin.

Power. Move.

Jordan decides to take it out on David.

“You are the skeleton of a man, David.”

The other men in the room either finish their drinks or hide their laughing behind decorative pillows.

“Attached to me is my professionality,” Jordan said. “It’s my face.”

Nothing is really resolved between the two. Contestant Chris receives the one-on-one date which consists of going to Capitol Records and meeting singer Richard Marx, who apparently sang “Right Here Waiting.”

Marx then sings to Kufrin while Chris looks on. Marx might have thought he was on the one-on-one and Chris was the special guest.

Chris and Kufrin then write love songs to each other, which is a very normal thing to do on a second date.

Chris tells Kufrin that he is uncomfortable opening up because he wrote a letter to his estranged father opening up about his feelings and his dad never responded.

Which is actually pretty sad and isn’t exactly a minefield for humor, so moving on. Marx sings the lines they wrote, which aren’t the worst in the world, and Chris receives a rose during the dinner later on.

During the night, David rolls out of bed and lands face first on the tile floor. Ambulance No. 1 is called and David is rolled away on a stretcher.

Host Chris Harrison, who makes his only appearance of the episode (seriously, how much is he paid), breaks the news to Kufrin.

“There was an incident at the house last night,” Harrison said, ominously. “One of your guys was rushed to the hospital and he’s in intensive care. It’s David. Busted nose, busted face.”

Which leads Kufrin to ask “who did this” because it was a very misleading start to that conversation. He then tells Kufrin that David fell out of bed.

“I feel bad for the guy but karma is karma,” Jordan said, empathetically reacting to the news.

While everyone waits to make sure David is fine, they go on another group date which ends up being a football group date, including contestant Clay, who is a professional football player. Like, in the National Football League.

Clay goes easy on the other team until they’re losing by 7-21 and he gets ready to win.

“Clay just decided to let loose and go insane,” Leo said.

Clay ends the game in a tie before somehow breaking his wrist on the last play. Ambulance No. 2 is called and Clay is carted away. He makes an appearance at the cocktail party later on and receives the group date rose from Kufrin.

“I’m happy right now,” Clay said. “To get this rose validates everything I’m feeling. This is 100 percent my best date ever.”

Which is impressive because either all of his dates were really crappy or this is just a really good date despite the whole breaking the wrist thing.

The next day, however, Clay receives the news that he has to have surgery on the wrist. To continue playing football, he has to have to surgery right away. However, that also means he must leave the show if he wants to continue making a living.

“He has such a big heart,” Kufrin said. “He really does.”

There is no rose ceremony during the episode, as already two men have been injured though David’s fate on the show is not yet known.